The Floating Merchant, The Dreaded Pirate's Trump Card

''In a unknown country in the Grand Line, a massive pirate fleet is seen docking on the port. A group of huge men are first seen jumping out into the ship and lands on the ground. Then other smaller men follow, the last one to jump is a slightly bearded man wearing a headband to keep his messy hair. ''

Big Pirate #1: Captain, are you really sure we can sell our wares in this village? Just by looking at this city, There ain't no god damn pirates or bounty hunters needing our supply.

The Bearded man was the captain, he just scratched his head and smiled at the Pirate.

Big Pirate #1: Captain?

Melon: Cmon, you can always call me Melon. I don't like getting called captain, I'm just a merchant for my Pirate crew.

Big Pirate #2: But captain, I mean Melon. We're your crew, so we should call you captain.

Melon: Guys, I know it's showing respect but please... I don't like being called captain, It sucks..

Big Pirate #3: Melon's right! We're not some ordinary pirates. We're merchant pirates! We help people by selling our state of the art wares that Akira-kun built.

Melon: Yeah, Akira's pretty awesome but it's up for us to sell it so we can help the Dreaded Pirates.

All the Pirates: YOSH!!!!

In a far away distance, a man is seen observing Melon and his group with a binoculars.

?????: Looks like there's another dumb ass pirate crew waiting to get killed...

He then calls another man with a den den mushi.

?????: Yo, We're gonna mug some pirate crew. Wanna join us?

The man he called answered with a maniacal laugh.

?????: Hwahehehehehehehe! Sure! Let's gut them alive and feed their insides to the dogs!

''The man with the binoculars was shocked at what he heard but quickly dismisses it, he then begins calling other people with his Den Den Mushi. They all agreed on one thing, kill the pirates and steal anything valuable. Melon and his crew are seen advertising their wares, for example, he introduced a seed of a fruit crossed between a mango and an apple. And unusual stuffs like a spoon that can shapeshift into a massive sword, guns that requires no gun powder but gemstones. And kitchen stuffs like a knife whose quality can be set and spoon and fork set that can enhance the flavor of any kind of food.''

Melon: Guys, Imma go get more supplies... Looks like the crowds are loving our wares.

Pirate #1: Roger that captain! But be quick, our supplies might deplete soon!

Melon: You don't have to tell me ( Laughs) Anyways, I'm off!!

The guy the binoculars is now seen rallying a group of thugs with makeshift melee weapons.

??????: Alright, alright! That man (Points at Melon) Has some valuable crap, so if we take it... WE'LL BE RICH!

Thugs: YAAAAH!

Melon, now carrying numerous wares is now walking when the guy with the binoculars and his thugs are seen standing in his way.

Melon: Pardon me but it seems you're blocking my way, so if you kindly please get out of the way.

?????: My name's Skullberg, and I want your wares, so give it to us or...

''Melon suddenly glares at Skullberg, he then grips on his fists and a loud cracking sound. Shocking the Thugs But not Skullberg.''

Skullberg: Heh, looks like you're a weird one... Maybe we'll make you normal when we're done beating you senseless!

Skullberg and his thugs charges at Melon, he stands there motionless and at the moment they start to close on hi he suddenly burst out a huge amount of wind knocking Skullberg and his thugs.

Thug #1: What the hell jsut happened?!

Skullberg: Heh! (Draws a stun baton) Two can play at that game you idiot..

Melon: Do you really think that can hurt me?

Skullberg: Uh, duh... I'm gonna use it to stun you and then beat you senseless!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Hey you guys! Help me out!

Thugs: Yaaaaaaaaaah!

Melon: (Breahtes Deeply) Things I do for crap.

He begins to display difficult martial arts move, taking the thugs one by one, but he figures out it's taking too long so he starts to take out larger groups.

Skullberg: Keh! What are you shitheads doing! There's only one of him you idiots!

Thug #5: This guy... He ain't normal!

''Skullberg sidekicks the thug, sending him flying. He then charges at Melon.''

Skullberg: If these idiots can't even touch you! Guess I'm gonna do it myself!

''Melon sends another thug flying with a punch, and then throws another thug at the another group of thugs. Skullberg closes in and prepares to stun Melon when he notices that he's to focused on fending off the thugs.''

Skullberg: I got you now you dumb piece of crap!!!

''Just when Skullberg was about to stun him, Melon quickly break his stun baton with a strong right kick, then proceeds to kick Skullberg with his left leg. Skullberg is sent flying, he quickly gets up and draws two longer stun batons.''

Skullberg: Let's see how you deal with this now! Double the trouble you bitch!

Melon: It's not really my style to go all out y'know. But it can't be helped.

Melon begins to lash out on Skullberg, Skullberg seems unable to keep up with Melon's moves and gets hit in the chest and is again sent flying.

Melon: I feel sorry for you, trying to mug me... And ended up losing. (Breathes deeply)

Skullberg: Kuh! Dumbshits! Get him now!

''The thugs who were trying to subdue melon is now too hurt to stand up, and the other ones who weren't seriously hurt were too scared. Skullberg stand up again and tries to hit Melon one more time.''

Skullberg: I'll kill you!!!!!!!!!!

Skullberg suddenly stops and started to feel his chest, a bullethole is seen and blood is coming out.

Skullberg: What... The hell?

????: JALALALALALALALAALAALALALA! You're an idiot Skull-chan!

Skullberg: Cossack... You asshole...

Skullberg collapses, and a man wearing a furry hat with white shirt and black fitting pants is seen walking in the sideline.

Cossack: Heh, get that ass a doctor. MOVE!

Thugs: Yessir!

Melon: So, another one of these piece of crap thugs... Ever heard of the saying "You're just 1 fish in a big ocean" Did it somehow made sense to you?

Cossack: Hm, wanna prove that wrong merchant?

''Cossack begins to draw a pair of tonfas with blade ends. And wastes no time and charges at Melon.''

Melon: Fuck this.

Melon counters Cossack by giving him a kick in the face, sending Cossack flying and knocks him out unconcious.

Cossack: Who're you..?

Melon: My name's Melon D. Slush. And so I hope this little scuffle might end soon. I'm running late and it's starting to make no sense.

Cossack: Keh, MORE OF US ARE COMING!

Melon: What did I ever do to you?

Cossack: The guy you just ridiculed over said something about valuable wares and about you being easy targets.

Melon: Easy targets?! I have a Pirate Fleet at my command! What went into your goddamn minds? Looks like I have to teach you dumb shits who you're messing with... Now tell me who's your so called leader?

Cossack: You may have beaten me and Skullberg, but our leader is so much stronger than us.

Melon: Hmmm, can he beat a pirate fleet with just some neighborhood thugs?

''Cossack is speechless, he realized they've made a big mistake. He's one of the big shots who flies like them don't have a chance of harming.''

Melon: I think so too. So where is he?

Cossack: Like hell I'm telling you!

Melon: I guess so.

''Melon begins to violently break Cossack's arms and kicks him out of the streets, alerting Melon's pirate comrades and the street thugs. Melon walks towards Cossack and kicks him again. The thugs tried to help him but they were stopped by Melon's men.''

Melon: Guys, we should execute him to teach these thugs that they ate what they can't chew.

''A pirate points his gun at the head of Cossack, he awaits Melon's command to fire but is suddenly sent flying by a kick by a man in his early 20's with a white unkept hair with an attire consisting of a fur coat with a white shirt underneath and fitting black pants. His most distinguishing feature is his multicolored slippers. Melon rushes to the Pirate who the white haired guy sent flying. And asks if he's okay, seeing that he's okay and then proceeds to apprehend the offender.''

Melon: Hey you! So you're the piece of shit bastard who wanted to steal my wares!

????: Yep! And My name's N'Fugo. And you're gonna surrender your wares or prepare to get your ass kicked!

Melon: Well N'Fuego, looks like you're gonna be in a hospital for 3 weeks cause you're acting like a dick ass bitch pirate named Bellamy... Glad Doflamingo took care of him... He was so full of words and so few of actions...

N'Fugo: Tch! Don't talk to my brother like that!!!!

''He begins to charge at Melon and the two exchange blows, but Melon then sends him flying with a punch. N'Fugo is barely keeping up and Melon has decided to end the match quickly... And quickly draws his knuckle duster with blades and charges in on N'Fugo. He slashes N'Fugo and kicks him down.''

Melon: Listen up, this guy who kicked this poser's ass is Melon D. Slash. I'm a member of the Dreaded Pirates and you must be wondering, "Hey, why is he alone? I thought he's a Dreaded pirate and he has a pirate fleet. I thought the Dreaded never had a pirate fleet, and most of all. WHY IS HE A MERCHANT!?" I get that all the time but this time, I'll explain it... I'm the Dreaded Pirate's trump card and I'll show up in the most dangerous times, y'see? Now we're gonna go and and be on our way. And if these thugs bother you again, I'll probably get back here and kick their asses again....

Thugs: ....

Melon: Now, let's move out!

THE END